Saturday, May 19, 2012

The World is Jack's Urinal

Guest post #2 on the blog. Another story that has to be told in the first person. I am an avid outdoors man who enjoys hunting, fishing, camping, etc. Much to my enjoyment, both of the boys have taken a liking to going on "adventures" with their dad.

Every spring (usually in February) male deer drop their antlers and begin growing them back for the fall breeding season in order to fight for the females. There is a window of a few weeks after the antlers are dropped before the forest turns green again. It is a perfect time to head into the timber with the boys and hunt for deer antlers with Jack and Tommy.

This particular Sunday, Grandpa Boddicker and I loaded our pockets up with snacks and bottled water and headed into the woods with Jack and Tommy. After about an hour of hiking through the woods Jack announced that he had to pee and wanted to head back to the house and find a toilet. Grandpa Mike and I explained to Jack that when boys are in the woods, they can pee on a tree or in the bushes. Jack dropped his pants to his ankles and got a big kick out of peeing in the woods. We headed back to the house empty handed. Alison rolled her eyes about Jack "going in the woods" but the life lesson had to be learned. And now the story starts....

The following day, Alison had an appointment at the doctor's office. I made it home from the office early to relieve Grandpa Mike Darby of his babysitting duties. The kids were hopped up and acting like maniacs. We made some small talk and Mike started laughing and informed me he had a story to tell.

"After Alison left everyone was playing in the backyard on the swingset." Mike said. "I was pushing Tommy on the swing while Jack was running around the yard. Next thing I know, Jack drops his pants to his ankles and started  peeing on the lawn."

I told Mike the about the hike in the woods and had to sit Jack down and explain the difference between peeing in the woods and peeing in the middle of the yard. Alison was mortified. I, on the other hand, could not stop laughing about the whole situation. Three months later and we have yet to have a repeat.


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